Ray (my_happy_places) wrote in climbingthewall,

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very hot & just as confusing

5:45 PM 12/5/09 · Shortly after I first popped onto twitter I started looking for people I knew and then people I admired. Among the latter was Penny Flame who has been hands down one of my favorite porn stars for awhile...

...which is saying something considering I've really only seen her in a couple scenes and a few photo spreads. Been off and on about setting up a fan community here, to go with the ones I've got of pornstars, and maybe I will one of these days but that's not the main point.

The thing of it is that she's absolutely beautiful when she's fucking, which you can say about a lot of the women in that line of work but she kind of kicks it up a notch higher somehow. It's also a given that not everything in porn, though hopefully les so than in professional wrestling, is 100% real but I always got the sense that she was spot on totally in the moment when a scene was going on.
  • Finding her on Twitter met with some mixed results:

    • 1) @EarthPresident: her main account while still in the porn industry

    • 2) @BecomingJennie: this is her current main account as she's no longer a pornstar

    • 3) @PennyFlame: this may be a fan account or a sockpuppet but I keep following it regardless

    About the time I got onto twitter she stopped actively being a pornstar...supposedly. May well be true but I'm a little sketchy on the matter for a couple reasons. Her porn website is still up, which I suppose makes a certain amount of sense insofar as residual income goes. I keep seeing reviews of new movies she's done coming out all the time, most recently as of about a couple weeks ago...

    ...and the claim is she quit the industry roundabout a year or so back.

    Decided to look her up on wikipedia, for this one time it had more info on a pornstar than wikiporno did. It attributed her leaving the industry in part to being on Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew, which I'd never heard of and couldn't find any listings for...at the time. It's an active program now, was watching it when I started typing this up, but I still haven't seen a full episode. Going to catch the new one next Sunday.

    Okay, calling it a 'claim' may be a bit harsh but it's just a thing with porn. Too many stars leave the industry and then wander back in. Hell, Ginger Lynn is in porn again! As Jenna Jameson says, caught her on Oprah a couple weeks back, you never ever stop being a porn star. Now, it's possible that all the movies I've been seeing reviewed that have Penny Flame in them were made prior to her quitting. Just as I saw her quitting being about her time on Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew which hadn't come out back then and is on now. I know stuff in all branches of the entertainment industry isn't actively being done at the time it's released necessarily.

    Just always got the sense that porn, particularly the gonzo stuff, was up on the shelf within weeks of being shot.

    During sex scenes she's the most wild and free creature I've ever seen, exactly what I look for in women to pleasure. When not actively having ze sex she just looks amazing. On Sex Rehab she's looks disturbingly like my friend SuziSuzi did a number of years back, which is still pretty damned good.

    Penny Flame is largely the reason I'm watching this show, to wrap my head around this change and maybe answer a few other things I'm a little confused about. Then there's just the one other reason too.

    I'm also a sex addict.

    I'm kinda self·diagnosed (hit up a sex addicts website and took their quiz but I was leaning that way prior) and not in therapy because while the addiction is strong it hasn't entirely gotten out of hand. Which isn't to say I don't have moment of being scraped raw, accidentally cutting myself in bad places with my claws, and frequent bouts of dehydration...

    ...it just hasn't seem to have gotten to that 'place' that the really hardcored addicts go.

    I attribute this less to my willpower than my ability to endlessly distract myself and that I'd much rather suffer in relative silence than do something enormously stupid.

    Tend to define horny as this particular feeling I get. Had it ever since I can remember, even when I was a little kid but didn't have any concept of what it was at the time. It's gotten progressively stronger over the course of my life to the point that I'm feeling it now. In my arms to my elbows, pounding thru my skull, all about my lower torso, radiating down my legs. Think of it as the lighting on a runway to direct all activity to a particular part of me that's not being so active right now. It's my constant companion and it is always screaming at me to feed it. During my 20's, when I was the most sexually active (went from double digits to triple in about 5 short years) it was just there enough for me to think I wasn't addicted and that I was just extremely highly sexed. Hell, I probably wasn't addicted at the time and maybe I might not've been at all if the span of time between having ze sex hasn't increased dramatically. From a day to a week to a couple months to how it is now...

    ...which averages anywhere from between several months to a year at times.

    I actually have a little crappy diary program on my PDA that I track when I've had sex so I can recall specifically.

    This feeling goes away when I'm having sex and doesn't start to build again until the sex stops. Very handy once upon a time as I was always ready to go again. Coupled with my innability to orgasm during sex, long lasting and seemingly endless stamina, I was very popular among women who's usual fuckbuddies, lovers, boyfriends (whatever they wanted to call them) could barely stay hard for 5 minutes. Close physical contact with a woman tends to ease the feeling off significantly for the time we're together, a close friend of mine visits me weekly for a TV night and the sex pangs go soothingly away while we're cuddled up, or more likely wrestling and tickling the crap out of each other, but resume almost immediately after her departure.

    One of many reasons I make it hard for her to leave.

    The feeling of my sex addiction, what I usually refer to as the NEED, has been with me forever and it's the source of the issue. I've never been sexually abused or physically so. Never used drugs and I don't much care for the taste of alcohol, been drunk only once in my entire life, so the usual things that I hear attributed to sex addiction don't apply to me.

    I still view the best method of treatment for my sex addiction to be ze sex, dancing the naked watusi, happy naked bouncing time, doing the dance of the beast with two backs...

    ...you'd be amazed how being excessively goofy can be a handy distraction for stuff like this.

    That may change in time. As stated, the NEED is getting progressively more powerful with each passing year. Probably could measure that in smaller increments but I'm not sure I wanna.

    Last 4 days have been Hell, if Damnation can be measured in one orgasm after another spread out over 30 minute breaks. It takes me about as long, if not longer, to get myself off normally. Not all of the orgasms have powerful. I seem to vary between highly pleasurable, just a good release and "okay I ejaculated but I'm not feeling it".

    That last one makes me worry, not at all seriously, if maybe I broke something.

    My current lady love, done 1 porn film and a number of shoots, hasn't had sex with me in awhile; Halloween to be exact. I haven't had sex with anyone else since then, benefits of an open relationship. Hurting quite badly at the moment but I'm dealing with it the best I can (ye olde knuckle shuffle and a lotta water) but otherwise my typical status quo.

    /end rant
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